One Trick Pony

So my dumbass new horse decides she's done with riding as soon as I get on her. Her new trick is to flatten her ears, try to kick me while I'm in the saddle, and then back up scarily. Of course I get off when she does this, and she's so happy she learned a way for me to get off immediately.

So I read up on what to do with this new pleasure-filled experience, and it says it's common for young horses to be assholes, basically, when they don't know what you want, and then once they do know what you want, they will be assholes. Especially mares.

Hmm. Today I set Maggie up in the little back paddock with a chair and had a nice talking to her. Just kidding. I put the chair as my mounting block, and I took my time putting my weight on her, and taking my foot in and out of the stirrup, leaning on her, flapping her stirrups, and finally getting on and then right off. I did it a few times until she didn't look like she was going to try and launch me spaceballs up. The last time, I just got on and then sat there. My goal was to sit there and not ask her to move, just sit there and see if she'd be good with just THAT step.

I sat there for minutes. Then I lifted the reins a little bit. Just so she could see that nothing bad was going to happen, and we weren't going anywhere. Then got off and took saddle off and done. Then I took her for a walk with Dewey on the close trail, the 5th time. She did better, only one spook that kind of spooked Dewey and I thought here's where I die but it was okay. She used to stop many times going out, but today she only tried it about 4 times before I got on Dewey and then only one or two times once riding. I say that's improvement. Now that I know that's normal, I don't get mad. I just get her going again and ignore it.

Tomorrow I'll try to start some of the games on the ground, to get her respecting me a bit more. In the afternoon today I took her out in the driveway and ground drove her around, in and out the gate. She was NOT going for it - she does fine for awhile, then has a little fit like I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT and she tries to push her way past me and turn and evade me like a wriggly thousand pound fish, and I'm not all that good with steering on the ground so it took me a few times to get her re-aimed, but I was resolved that she would walk in and out of the gate without being an asshole before I'd quit for the day. By the end, she was walking in and out like it was the most boring thing in the world, like she was punching a clock. I put her away, happy she did what I asked but also knowing that it was only today. She was clearly doing me a favor, in her mind. We are a long way from her being boring every time. She does LIKE the challenge, though. I see it in her. Because she doesn't try to do anything really mean. She's scary, because she's big and silly and I don't know her, but it's only been a month. Pretty soon I will know all her tricks, and be able to manage her better, and guide her to her best self. I hope. I did today, anyway, for 5 minutes. Or maybe almost an hour total.

She is a really kind horse around the barn. She just has to learn her job, and that she has tasks, and that it can be easy or it can be hard. That's the part she's learning now.

Dewey is okay with being the forgotten horse. He was a good leader on the trail, and doesn't mind her sneezing all over him. He's okay with me steering with my legs and butt as I haul her with my other hand, and it's good practice. Who knew I had a lower body.

You Herd Right

I like the day where nothing bad happens.

Today I took the new Maggie mare out with Dewey the wonder horse. It's only our fourth time together out on our little close trail, and 3rd time ponying.

Reading and using ideas on training has really helped, especially with being patient. Today she did really well, she's settled into knowing her job. She still likes to stop a few times on the way out, I'd say maybe 6 times today. But now I stop Dewey and tug on her halter and she starts back up. I'd like to figure a way to start her back up that will translate better to when I'm in the saddle, so I chirped to her at the same time as tugging a few of the times. I think turning Dewey and going back for her would help, but I don't really want to turn around the Dewey barge, it's hard enough just to figure out how to stay on him while leading her.

Luckily I practiced stopping a few times, just to get that cue in, and rested and had them learn to just stand and relax, listening to the nature sounds. It gave me time to see that her halter had half pulled off over her ear (yikes) so I got to fix that and disaster averted. Hey, it's like I'm learning and thinking. And taking time to stop is actually a good thing. What is the rush, dude.

I'm also happy to learn how to hold my body differently - since I'm riding one-handed, I have to give with my Dewey hand or he lifts his head like ouch stop pulling my face. So I'm realizing I can use my legs a lot more, to move him over to the side, to anchor myself. My right hand is all focused on the mare, and making sure she stays with us. Using the whole body is crazy, it makes me see how I usually carry my entire self up in my throat. A nice fear and tension party up there, and all of me is invited.

Anything that helps me slow down, melt back down into my body, breathe and try and relax and even enjoy the (harrowing) process is good. It's the newness that is scary - not knowing her well yet, and being scared that she'll do something I can't handle, or cause a chain reaction in Dewey...But today I was thinking as I rode, that horses just want to go forward, at a relaxed pace. They are not in a rush. They will be just as happy as me to have an uneventful ride. Me being the boss mare doesn't mean pre-worrying about things. I sit deep, trust my horse, look out for danger, and trust my horse. And feel peace!

Luckily, I have worked with Dewey for 4 yrs straight, until we were so sick and bored of each other that it was finally time for the right young mare to come into our lives. So she has a spot, and Dewey gets to be the older brother, not perfect, but he's comfortable with the trail, he knows it, I don't ask him to do too much. I figure the more simple we keep it, the better the chance for all of us to get used to going out together, and already she's more respectful on the lead, and will learn to not stop! And I get to use my Dewey skills, more leg, trust, more rein, trust. He's happy to just amble along, and their paddock is so muddy right now, it's much better out on the trial, moving their bodies without slopping through the mud.

Once I get Maggie used to the close trail and the long trail, I'll bring Becky back out with us, and our trail team will be complete. Becky can't come til I have another butt in the saddle and I don't have to pony the mare.

I'm glad she had a good start, with people who handled her right. She came to us not afraid of things, and generally loved. She got out maybe once a month with them. Here she gets brushed at least once a day, worked with once a day, lots of attention, and a buddy horse who is happy to have her.

She's not as worried when he's out of her sight anymore - yesterday we were ground driving right here in the driveway, and I even started going out front on the gravel road, just to get them used to being worked separately. Have to do it in small lessons, since they are definitely attached and call to each other. But the one being worked is always happier than the one being left behind. Tomorrow I'll do more ground driving, or maybe get her under saddle a bit in the arena. I'm doing ground work/arena/turnout, individual work in driveway and then walks on trail, every other day. Variety. She also has a snotty nose and cough, so keeping an eye on it. But she is perky and happy to go out. A very mellow and kind girl, her energy is good for Dewey. She's a lot like him. She's not worried about much.

I can't imagine it yet, since I'm in the kindergarten area with her still, but I'm putting in the work to make her a quiet, listening horse, who is happy to take relaxing rides with me and my kids. I'm putting in the turn signals, and the brakes, and showing her the surroundings, and eventually it'll be me and one of my kids out there, enjoying the trail like she was born this way none of this work ever happened.

I am happy that Travis the sheep has been here a year, and helped Dewey have company until we got Maggie in. He belongs to the barnyard, and Dewey loves him, but now that he has Maggie he's less anxious about Travis. I think a horse likes his own kind, and likes a small herd to belong to. Lifelong process, this learning animal behavior, riding, manners, being a bossy leader, all of it.

Put the Mad on Hold

I love working with the new pony. Once I realized she was just young, and not being an asshole, it gave me a sense of humor, and some patience. I figure, only a year or so ago, she was just a baby frolicking around in a field. So now she's here, and she's mine, so how best can I use her curiosity and work ethic, and also put the mad on hold, when I get frustrated if she's not understanding what I want her to do, and just give her a second. Or figure out what it is she's trying to figure out, and help her achieve it. Horses are a lot easier than teenage sons. But maybe Maggie can help me to remember that only a few years ago, he too was frolicking around in a field. Now there's this whole one year away from college. Preparing him, helping him. The world is new to all of us.

Teenage boy and baby horse

In With the New

So there's this new horse. She's young, sassy, solid, and silly. Part of me is broken off and floating somewhere nearby with the stress of working again with a young and way different new horse. But part of me is 4 years older from having worked with Dewey all that time, and able to slow down, give her a chance, and correct her when she's being a fruitcake. Without getting mad. (have not totally accomplished this yet.) Maggie is from Oregon, buttermilk colored, like a giant dog with love and a wagging tail. She is also exactly like the sheep - busting into to whatever you're doing, saying PICK ME PICK ME when going to work with her, but then when actually working has the attention span of an amphetamine addict jumping on a trampoline. But I do LIKE the old girl. For some reason. She lets Dewey boss her around. She's pretty bright about not freaking out at new things, she is half angel half devil. I have to remember that she is still a youngster who wants to play and eat everything including me at times. This is part of her charm. She will become a horse that will turn right and left, and stop, and walk calmly on a leadrope. She will be able to cart me and our kids around safely and sanely. She is already making Dewey very happy just to have a buddy who is an actual horse, near him at night in the barn when he must have been very dark and lonely, on his little empty horse planet. I just have to survive it, and sometimes stop trying so hard, and love instead. Maybe in all areas, moms.

Lose a Ball, Gain Some Insight

So it's best not to ride when you have a cyst in your pants. I found that out two weeks ago, on a Monday. When I rode the last time, and swung up into the saddle and felt like hmm, sitting on a hard golf ball that is actually my BALL. Attached to me. Painful. I rode anyway, because I was all dressed for it and Dewey and I were aimed toward the trail and the creek is on the trail, and well we had to do that. When you're all geared up for water, and nature, you just have to keep going, balls and all. Three days later I was driving to the ER to have my ball drained, and it was not as fun as it sounds. The good news is it's only temporary and I get to have it permanently removed this Thursday, for those of you marking your calendars. It was just an old cyst, but too much riding made it an old, big mean villain cyst. I hope to keep it with my sheep's ball that I have in the tack room. Maybe we can make a little necklace. In the mean time (and I am mean when not getting to ride), although it's nice to not have to ride sort of-- in the mean time the kids are getting to actually ride, and get their chance to learn the basics like I wanted but never was ready to do. Two kids have already been up and I'll keep it up in the next month while I'm grounded. I'm also back to teaching Dewey to drive, and we got to have him wear his driving bridle with blinkers for the first time. Then I walked him around with that on. Then I drove him around the paddock with that on. Then I drove him around the arena with that on. Next we'll try the street. He seems fine with not being able to see me. Something interesting I learned- if he's used to your steady hands on the reins, and your voice, and your reassuring touch, he doesn't much mind not being able to see you. The horse feels you, hears you and trusts you - he is built for work, and to be a team. He's way better at all this than you are. So really you are the one learning while he's saying of course we're working together. That's what we're doing. All this time. So one ball lighter, and maybe Dewey will pull a cart eventually. And I become aware that I am more than I knew I was, and that Dewey already knew this.

It's All in the Delivery

Dewey's Nemesis. Effing Fed Ex. If you're a rider on a young tall horse, and you're riding next to the road, Fed Ex will find you. Fed Ex will test your skills at staying on and controlling your horse when he turns and tries to run the other way. I don't know if Dewey got a bad package once. A letter bomb. Some sort of hate mail. Because when he sees Fed Ex he knows DANGER. Fed Ex has the biggest, whitest, rattliest trucks on the road. Fed Ex is not going to slow down. They are Federal EXPRESS. They are in a hurry. Young thoroughbreds do not enjoy a big rattly white monster coming at them at 45 miles an hour on our road. I always put my cowboy blinders on and scan the road for the white monster. The delivery hell. Delivering me from my spinning and terrified horse to the hard ground. I keep a watch. You can hear me mutter, out on the trail, when I see it coming. F**cking Fed Ex... And turning my horse into the nearest driveway or getting off and making space. Dewey can do space between him and the evil. Just can't do bearing down, rattling, speeding, white vision of hell. We never wave at FedEx.

On the mountain, with Fed Ex at a safe distance, Dewey thinks. Someday. I will get a delivery I like.

Saddle Up

So I got a new old saddle for $150 bucks after selling my Aussie saddle since it was too wide for Dewey anyway, and I like to switch things up. I decided a Big Horn half synthetic saddle could be my western lightweight alternative, and it's been fun to try. I like to worry about the saddle fit, and then make the blanket match the saddlebags (I guess I am a girl in some ways), and I like to take Dewey out for the nice walk through the neighborhood trail because it's quiet and no one is talking to me and I see birds flying and I get to test my skills if Dewey gets nervous. But either turning 8 is making him mature, or we've just been lucky the last few months, because Dewey is becoming a laid back guy. He'll do whatever I ask, he's seemed to stop throwing in the occasional buck and stopped being wary of things. Now if he's worried about something on the path, he'll stop and we'll both look at it and then we'll keep going, or I'll get off and walk him past it, or we'll just give it a little more space so he feels comfortable. The riding is giving me a place to put all the stress of summer. The kids have only been back in school for a week but I'm still dumping all the activity and food preparation for those two months of sunup to sundown service out on the trail. I've been too tired to actually do the big trail that requires walking over a huge hill to get there. It's the more beautiful trail, it has water and large empty space. For now I'm just doing an hour ride a day, walking around trying out the different saddle. Letting my mind wander. I will get back to writing and doing work. Getting to ride Dewey is the one place I don't have to do anything else except ride Dewey, and contemplate things.